What An Absent Father Loses About

An absent father loses so much.

You miss paternity and all the amazing experiences it brings. You miss all the moments that make life worth living.

The magical childhood quickly disappears; it flows through your fingers like sand. All the experiences we share, all beautiful memories. Once they have disappeared, they will never come again.

I get sad when I see that your children do not mean anything to you, that their love is wasted and that you do not care about the beautiful gifts that life has given us.

I understand the emptiness in your gaze, for I know what is missing in your heart. You did not want to live up to your obligations as a father, and you chose instead to spend the nights drinking and partying until the sun rose.

At the same time, the truths of life were here at home. As an absent father, you lose paternity.

You lose as much as an absent father

I have continued to move forward, just as life has taught me to do. Everything for them, my little angels. I smiled at you and wished you the best, from the bottom of my heart, for the good of our children.

I did not pretend to notice what happened the days after we separated. I protected myself from the pain and protected our children from your bad example. You are so immature that can not appreciate the treasures that life has given you.

You should have been a man. You should be someone that the children could look up to and respect – a role model.

You should have been there for them when they needed you, but you failed at this, and yet they love you with all their hearts. They think of you and wait for you – in vain.

Here at home, our days are full of pure, deep and unconditional love. They are filled with color and harmony by their sweet little voices.

The hours fly by as we play games, sing songs and tell funny jokes, memories that last forever.

I do not blame you, but I feel sorry for you

I’m not blaming you. I feel sorry for you. I do not hate you either. The only thing I can feel is sadness and remorse.

Of course, I wish things had been different. It really pains me to see you like this, to see that you are missing out on the best in life. But I’ve already released you.

Time heals but it does not erase or rewind. You can try to regain the time you have lost, but I will continue to enjoy every second by their side.

Go to bed with whoever you want, whenever you want. I’m the one who sleeps with my little ones.

Continue with your parties and your drinking. I teach my children to become artists, doctors or whatever they dream of.

You can brag about how you meet a new woman every night, but I reach a love that will last forever.

Keep doing what you’re always done, keep making excuses while I create memories. You would have been surprised to see how much your children have learned, how much they have grown and how smart they are. To me, this is nothing new, because I see it every day.

I have taught them things and strengthened their values. I do not think you even understood why. It’s such a shame that you will be surprised to see how they try to be caring and loyal.

This is not surprising to me. I know how beautiful they are . My strength, and my weakness. They love me just as much as I love them.

You lose paternity as an absent father

As long as you continue to live selfishly and constantly put yourself first, you will lose paternity and not understand how amazing it is.

I now understand that this role was too much for you. Being a father is not just a biological function. It is a full-time job and something that brings joy.

The children you now say you love are slipping away from you. You do not know what they want or what they are interested in.

You have no idea what dreams they have or what they are afraid of. You do not know what they have achieved and what they have failed at. You do not know their frustrations and what they have struggled with. You do not know what their favorite food is or what books and toys they like.

You do not know what they have learned to do or what they have become successful in, when they have their training and when they have a match.

But I know I will always be there to cheer on them. I’m the one they look at to be assured that everything’s okay.

I’m not blaming you. You were just a little confused boy who failed to teach them how to be a gentleman. You have no principles, so how could you teach them what is right and wrong?

This is a role you never took on. I’m not mad at you because I understand that you never managed to change.

In fact, the day my children were born, my life changed. However, yours continued in the same way. Your days and nights did not change.

My anger has now faded and I just feel sorry for you. You miss paternity as an absent father, while I’m here enjoying every second with the children I love with all my heart.