Do You Choose A Partner Who Is Similar To Your Parents?

Young people spend a large part of their lives with their parents. And as children, parents are their greatest role models when it comes to love relationships. Therefore, it should come as no surprise that many, as they get older, choose a partner who is similar to their parents.

But, where does this idea of ​​choosing a partner who is like their parents come from?

The emotional environment

Adults deal with their emotions based on what they learned while growing up. This also explains young people’s receptivity when it comes to finding a partner. They often choose to spend their lives with someone who has both physical similarities and the same personality traits as their parents.

Of course, individuals make their choices subconsciously and without even noticing it. Still, there are many young people who fall in love with partners who are in some way similar to their parents. Once they realize this, they are often surprised, and the first instinct is usually to deny the fact.

They convince themselves that it is impossible. But the fact is that it is scientifically proven.

Of course, this does not mean that children fantasize about or feel attracted to their parents. Rather, it has to do with habits and upbringing.

When children see an adult perform a specific task, they imitate it because they believe that is how things should be done. It’s just a matter of following the parents’ example and repeating familiar patterns.

Model for sustainable relationships

That is why parents are such important role models for their children. Growing up close to a healthy relationship that includes mutual love and respect drives children to look for a similar relationship.

When children are very young, the thought of a love affair is rather unpleasant. But as they grow up, they realize that they can use their parents’ example to find happiness and love themselves.

In the same way  , it is very important that children do not have to grow up watching their parents quarrel and quarrel. All negative examples during childhood will also affect a child’s future, personal decisions.

As adults, they will try to heal the wounds and heal the pain they experienced due to their parents’ unhealthy relationship. Unfortunately, it is very likely that they themselves will end up in conflict-filled relationships.

Why choose a partner who is similar to the parents?

According to scientific studies , it is statistically probable that one’s ideal partner is based on traits that he or she shares with the parents. 

Researchers in the USA confirm that  there is a link between the genome of different couples. 

But in addition to genetics , we must also analyze and understand factors that affect upbringing. It is one of the reasons for one’s choice of partner – the traits shared by one’s parents.

A life based on love and respect

This is actually the main reason why we as adults choose a partner who is similar to our parents. If we have always seen our parents live happily together, and they have given their children love and care, we will seek the same for ourselves.

When an individual is shown love and care from an early age , it is understandable that you feel a strong bond with your parents. 

If the parents also make sure to offer a good home and meet the children’s basic needs, it is logical that they become good examples to emulate. Unconsciously, when they grow up, children will fall in love with someone who can live up to that role.

Why is it like that? Well, we feel that this person will not hurt us, because we base our decisions on emotions and experience. If we have always been happy with someone who behaves in this way, we will want to spend the rest of our lives in the same way.

The ideal partner

Your ideal partner does not necessarily have to look like your parents. The important thing is that the person you want to share your life with has a similar attitude and values.

In these cases, the attraction you feel may be based on psychological similarities between your parents and your partner.

This can be difficult to understand. However, it is  important to choose a partner that suits your personality and lifestyle, even if this choice may be completely unconscious.